Friday, December 26, 2014

Goa to Puducherry

Males assumed that any romantic attraction they experienced was mutual & assume its mutual !! October 23, 2012 |By Adrian F. Ward

Men were much more attracted to their female friends than vice versa. Men were also more likely than women to think that their opposite-sex friends were attracted to them—a clearly misguided belief. In fact, men’s estimates of how attractive they were to their female friends had virtually nothing to do with how these women actually felt, and almost everything to do with how the men themselves felt—basically, males assumed that any romantic attraction they experienced was mutual, and were blind to the actual level of romantic interest felt by their female friends. Women, too, were blind to the mindset of their opposite-sex friends; because females generally were not attracted to their male friends, they assumed that this lack of attraction was mutual. As a result, men consistently overestimatedthe level of attraction felt by their female friends and women consistentlyunderestimated the level of attraction felt by their male friends.

Taken together, these studies suggest that men and women have vastly different views of what it means to be “just friends”—and that these differing views have the potential to lead to trouble. Although women seem to be genuine in their belief that opposite-sex friendships are platonic, men seem unable to turn off their desire for something more. And even though both genders agree overall that attraction between platonic friends is more negative than positive, males are less likely than females to hold this view.
So, can men and women be “just friends?” If we all thought like women, almost certainly.  But if we all thought like men, we’d probably be facing a serious overpopulation crisis.

In recent years, we have come to understand that relations between men and women are governed by a sexual politics that exists outside individual men’s and women’s needs and choices.  It has taken us much longer to recognize that there is a systematic sexual politics of male-male relationships as well.  Under patriarchy, men’s relationships with other men cannot help but be shaped and patterned by patriarchal norms, though they are less obvious than the norms governing male-female relationships.  A society could not have the kinds of power dynamics that exist between women and men in our society without certain kinds of systematic power dynamics operating among men as well.
Men do not just happily bond together to oppress women.  In addition to hierarchy over women, men create hierarchies and rankings among themselves according to criteria of “masculinity.” Men at each rank of masculinity compete with each other, with whatever resources they have, for the differential payoffs that patriarchy allows men.

He had some difficulty in keeping his trousers zipped up: Vinod ... The revelation about his former colleague at Outlook and former editor-in-chief of Tehelka magazine- Tarun Tejpal- who was accused of sexually assaulting a female colleague in Goa has give new twist to the infamous tale.
Mehta in his book writes that he was aware that Tejpal was using his official position to hit on interns and juniors for both consensual and presumably non-consensual carnal favours.

A critique of "The Lives of Sri Aurobindo" by Peter Heehs and its consequences in the Ashram life: Raj TV programme in Tamil on Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust on 23 December, 2014
Summary in English of Koppium Raj TV programme on Sri Aurobindo ... The Ashram Trust complained to the police against the sisters; the matter went to ...

Ashram's Administration Refuses Hemalatha Prasad's Allegation Against Ashram - Thanthi TV

Aurobindo Ashram terms suicide of two sisters, their mother 'heart › City PUDUCHERRY: Terming the suicide attempt by the five sisters and their parents in which two of the sisters and their mother lost their lives as "very unfortunate ...

  • AUROBINDO ASHRAM EVICTION: Surviving sister says raped after ...
    7 days ago - On Thursday, five sisters and their parents attempted to commit suicide by wading into the sea.
  • Evicted from Aurobindo ashram, 7 of family jump into sea, 3 die | The ...
    Dec 18, 2014 - On Wednesday, another member of the family -- Hemlata Prasad, one of the five sisters, made a suicide attempt.
  • Two sisters, mother end life after eviction from Aurobindo ashram › National
    Dec 18, 2014 - A day after five sisters from Bihar were evicted by police from the Aurobindo ... two of them and their mother allegedly committed suicide by jumping into the sea  ...